There's no question that I'm a more capable teacher now than I was when I began teaching eleven years ago. I am better at anticipating students' questions. I can build a class discussion out of next to nothing (mostly because I am better at filling up time with my own blather). I'm better at reading my students and adapting my practices. But I am also unquestionably a grumpier teachier. I have less patience for questions like: when are we going to write something fun? when is this assignment due? did I miss anything important? I can barely stand it when students hand me a stack of loose papers when I've specifically reminded them (in writing and in person) to bring a folder or a paper clip.
I'm not always grumpy. There are moments when I think my students are charming and brilliant. Last night, while responding to drafts, I actually found myself excited to read the next one. But overall, I am much more of a grump.
So I wonder whether the increased grumpiness negates the increased capability. What makes a better teacher, after all? Effective classroom management or non-grumpiness? I think I'm going to get Will to plot this all on his fancy math program, to see the interactions between increased skill and increased jadedness.
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7 comments:
It is hard not to be grumpy when you're teaching a lot. I don't know what in the hell that means, because I'm probably the grumpiest person I've ever met and I'm not teaching a lot formally this semester. If you disagree, then I would say that my mask is quite effective.
I kind of look back fondly on the days when I was teaching way too much (6 classes!) I was young and decided chipper with all the classes. I think I would fall apart now if I had to teach even just 3 classes.
I too find it hard not to slip into a grump at pretty much the slightest provocation. I would definitely like to see that graph. Can you make it in pretty colors? because that would cheer me up.
I too am grumpy. Especially at the students who want me to explain every assignment for the next class when it's in the f*ing syllabus and I explained how to read a syllabus on the first day. Sigh. I fear I will not get any less grumpy as time goes on. I like to think it's what makes me loveable, somehow, but I know it's not.
I'm nodding my head furiously. I know exactly what you mean. It's like the more I poured into becoming a better teacher (the research! the conferences! the observations! the reflection! the eternel quest for better materials!), the more frustrated I got by my students' lack of effort in return. Like you said, not all of them are apathetic and forgetful--but they seemed to outnumber the ones that weren't, and they're the ones I tended to remember at the end of the day.
Now I'm a librarian. Now I'm grumpy about different things!
Grumpy is good. I too would like to see grumpiness and years of teaching graphed.
Nodding head furiously too. I just got an email from a student saying could you explain this genre case study? Unbelievably the student had replied to the email I sent out which says in the first line "see the attachment for instructions on the genre case study assignment" !!!!! F***CCCCKKKKK !!!
So, yeah. I'm definitely grumpier, more jaded, less naive, but more able, I think, to recognize teaching moments and how to help particular students given their aptitude and personality.
My hope (guess) is that increased grumpiness probably does negate increased capability as measured by the student evals. But, I hope I hope, as measured by what students actually learn, our capacity is kicking ass. God help us all if it isn't.
These posts are a hoot. Grumpiness should be part of the job benefits - like health insurance and holidays. Listen, we're people not machines. And even sensitive people want to hit their heads against the proverbial wall when asked the same inane question for the 100th time. Oops. No question is stupid or inane? Guess again. I just don't like to see their faces fall when nice prof's persona slips and they get to see a genuinely irrated person. Such a disappointment (albeit temporarily) to see their prof is human . . .
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