This morning, Will and I were talking about romance novel covers after having been sent this by Sarah of 3 Tarts. Suddenly I had this memory of a Christmas party from when I was a tutor at UVSC. We did white elephant gifts and someone brought a romance novel. A co-worker read the back cover, giving a compelling performance that had all of us on the floor laughing. The thing about the memory was that I had completely forgotten about that co-worker. She was a woman that I liked and respected and until that moment it was as if she hadn't existed. It was a shock to suddenly see her face, hear her voice. I still can't remember her name.
It has me thinking about all the people that come into our lives only to get lost somewhere in our memory. And why our memory brings them back at certain times. I wonder what else or who else I've forgotten.
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I've been teaching long enough that I've forgotten some of my students. Sometimes I'll see a name and not even recall until later that it belongs to a student from a couple of semesters or years ago. Or I'll see a student I seem recognize on campus and not know if she was in my class or not. I was even looking at my computer file of letters of recommendation today and realized that I don't remember some of the students I praised to scholarship committees and grad schools at one point. And yet when I was seeing them three days a week, I knew their writing strengths and weaknesses, their handwriting, their hairstyle.
Yes, I forget students all the time too. Recently, my niece placed her baby for adoption. I was visiting her at the hospital and her caseworker came in. She looked at me and said, "You were my English teacher." I had no memory of her at all. Eventually, I gathered up a vague one. It was strange seeing this student I could barely remember so actively involved in my niece's life.
Certainly worthwhile and a relief: the first time I clicked on your blog it gave me an error message and I thought Unhip had packed up the blog on order to write children's books.
Just last week a teacher came by my office asking for pencils. He looked very familiar, more familiar than just someone I'd seen passing in the halls but I rationalized I'd probably passed him while he was making copies. Later, he returned the pencils commenting, "You look really familiar." Turns out we'd been in a teaching colloquium five years ago and had a number of interesting conversations--I'd totally forgotten about him.
Don't get me started on what I don't remember! At least I know that I don't remember it. I have a photographic memory for faces. I saw a guy at AWP whose name I still can't remember. But I know that I knew, at one point, who he was. And yes, I forget students the minute I turn in my grades. It's like purging.
I posted a few days ago, but it looks like blogger ate the comment. Damn blogger!
What I was saying, effectively, is that going through and recycling years' worth of student papers, etc., has given me a fine occasion to reflect on all the people whose writing I've read, commented on, etc. Like ghosts, sort of. A slightly weird and haunting experience.
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